A new determination

So I'm testing out another weight loss pill cocktail. It has pretty good reviews. So far the almost everyone says it's effective, and the down side is that the pills are huge, taste bad, and it's 7 of them. My goal is to get down to 93 lbs by july 1st. that's 10 days. for 10ish lbs, I know i most likely will fail but fuck, i need to a challenge that requires me to devote more of my energy to losing weight. I don't do well with the loose weight by making one or 2 small changes, no, it has to be a massive overhaul that is the result to 100% focus. That's how i dropped 20 lbs without fasting, pills, coffee, tea, vomiting, diet soda, zero calorie sweeteners, diet food, ect in 6 months the first time around. I need that same dedication NOW!

This is cuz i have another convention on the 1st and because for the last week i've been failing so bad i wish someone would beat me with a steel mallet.  

Convention time.... Dun Dun Duuuunnnn!!!

So I'm not going to be back on blogger till monday sometime. I'm too afraid to weigh myself, though i've been pretty good this week. I'm sure i'll lose weight at the convention, everyone usually loses 5-9 lbs during the duration of the con because you don't eat or sleep for 4 days and you're walking around all day photoshooting, and walking around all night dancing, partying, going crazy basically. I think the ultimate dream come true would be i come back on monday weight 95 lbs. or less. Even though the con is only 15 minutes from my house i'm staying at a hotel with my friends, that way i can party all night and i won't be tempted to binge at home, nor will i feel guilty when my family eats home made meals together cuz i won't be there. Basically at cons the only thing anyone eats are granola bars, cup noodles, Starbucks, ben and jerrys, and Mc donalds. Sounds like a fat ass's paridise right? Yet people still lose shit tons of weight because you are literally on your feet, modeling for 12 hours a day, then you go and party all night, and sleep during those short hours betwen 6 am and 10 am. Plus you only eat once a day because at cons food is soooooo expensive so you only eat when you feel like you're gonna pass out. And repeat for 4 days. I'm sooo excited. I'll put up pictures when i get back. Pray that i fall subject to the con weight loss phenomenon. The other great thing is that there are no markets in the area so i can't buy food to binge and purge even if i wanted to.The only thing i'm worried about is that the people i'll be will like to go out to eat at night like late night. Which is when i'm  weakest interms of being able to resist food. but well see, maybe i'll just wear my corset so tight that 3 sips of water and i feel so full i'm about to explode (i've done this before, and it does hurt, but it's so worth it sometimes). God i'm so excited. I'm going to go to peets later today cuz i need to be awake all night in preparation for this weekend. I might post again later today but right now i have to go to my professor's awards ceremony and a job interview. See you later !!